But I Feel Like a Fraud!!

I spent some time recently with an accomplished and seasoned executive who had just been promoted. “I never thought I’d have a job like this!” he said and “I’m not ready, don’t know what I’m doing, and I feel like a fraud!”

The so called imposter syndrome is common and affects many capable people in positions they are well prepared for but of which they are intimidated. It is a feeling that “I don’t belong here,” “I’m not good enough, smart enough, well credentialed enough,” or otherwise threatened by the fact that “everyone is watching me.”

A risk that my friend faced was that he would be immobilized by the need to “get it right” so much that he wouldn’t even get it started. It’s easy when afraid of failure to seek perfection over progress, to “catastrophize” every possible action, and to stay stuck until failure comes to meet you.

Begin by focusing on what others need and the value you can add to whatever the situation may be. Because the “imposter syndrome” is all about a focus on one’s self, you can begin to control it by focusing on others. That is, after all, what your business and all of life is about. Take small steps.

Know you character virtues and souls gifts. Your accomplishments were built largely on the use of your core abilities. They are there to guide your life.

Go get a mentor or business coach who has been in your shoes, who has faced his/ her own internal monsters, and is able to help you see behind your own mask. You will need to do some searching to find this person; many who hold themselves out as able to guide you are still lost in the desert themselves.

Keep the high standards you’ve set for yourself and be gentle with your self.

Build your internal resilience with a practice of “secret acts of virtue.” Find people, within the company or unconnected to it, for whom you can perform some “act of kindness or virtue.” The act needs to be of some significance to that person, helpful in some meaningful way, and must remain as anonymous as possible. The individual you’re helping may need to know, but don’t let the secret out beyond that. Do not tell anyone what you’ve done and take no credit for it.

While this may sound unrelated to your business, understand that everything you do in your business begins with you and whatever strengthens you can also help the business.

We will explore this further in the future but for now simply know that good secrets have the power to strengthen you, but a key is that they remain secret.

We are there for you: www.talentdevelopmentworks.com kip@talentdevelopmentworks.com